10 Mar '17 — Unstable subconscious
Every time I walk in my neighborhood in Berlin, I think people are trying to run me over. Whether they're approaching me or getting around me, people get uncomfortably close.
'They're passively aggressively telling me I'm in their way,' I think. But how could so many people be passive aggressive?
I assumed the aggression was the result of living in a city. Claim every inch you can get! Overtime, people become mean.
'I have to move to the country. Look how city living has made these people! I don't want to end up so passive aggressive. It's not healthy to be around so much aggression'. Perhaps where there's more space, people are relaxed enough to give way.
Only after I came back from the States did I realize what was actually happening. Even on the narrowest sidewalks in Seattle or Austin, no one was pushing beyond a certain distance from me. I never felt like my personal space was being invaded.
The difference is subtle. But because I have a larger sense of personal space, the threshold I'm comfortable gets invaded by those who have a smaller sense of personal space. It's appropriate to get that close to me because, why not? They wouldn't feel uncomfortable.
Seeing that perhaps there are no mean intentions, I am more relaxed walking around.
I never thought my sense of personal space would be such an issue.